Has a Scissor Happy Stylist Left You Suicidal?

What do you do when you get a bad haircut? What is your criteria for deeming a haircut good or bad? It’s been that long since I’d ever had one (a bad haircut, that it), I forgot how sad it makes me. Years ago I would weep for a day or two, ruing the day I ever went into the salon. I would chastise myself for being rash and impetuous. This is usually after I chop off my long long locks for a short and spiky style (which I always grew to love). It’s just that I suffer separation anxiety with my hair, I guess. I would just be suffering from shock.

Just last week, I finally made a hair appointment. I am nervous to say it had been exactly a year and half since my last cut (judge me all you want) but I was going through a growing-it-really-long phase. I was highly successful. It nearly touched my belt loops. But I knew I would need a trim and I longed for cute chunky bangs again and I was hesitant to cut them myself. In retrospect, I should have cut them myself. They are blunt and shapeless (not at all what I am used to when I have bangs) and even my mother in law made fun of them. And that trim? I somehow lost six inches instead of one. As an aside, my hair is in pretty good shape despite the torture I wreak upon it. Frankly, I dote on my locks and it has kept them fairly healthy.

I now feel naked and exposed from the back. My mum says my hair is still long but it certainly doesn’t feel that way. I also realize I made a mistake requesting long layers. They just don’t look right. Probably because they are not in fact long, but rather short in comparison to the longest lengths of my hair. I guess the point of my rant is that even when you have long hair, you can still get a bad cut. Maybe there are more ways to conceal the butchery when you have the length, but the psychological scarring is just as damning, short do’s or long. And if this all wasn't bad enough? The joke’s on me. For the sake of cordiality I still tipped the man handsomely. It cost me seventy bucks to be sad, depressed and disappointed. I could have achieved the same effect watching the movie One Day again for free.

This should've been my "after". It's not. I shall say no more.